Tuesday Tunes!

Strange Music? CHECK!
Weird costumes? CHECK!
Cool Blacklight paint CHECK!

It must be Patrick Wolf's "Hard Times"

ShamWOW? More like ScamNOW!

10 Children's Books I so desperately want to see become a reality:

1. "Babar becomes a Piano"

2. "Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence"

3. "Controlling the playground: Respect through Fear"

4. "Things Rich Kids Have, but you never will"

5. "The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and are Shot Dead"

6."Some Kittens Can Fly"

7. "When Mommy and Daddy Don't Know the Answer, They Say God Did It"

8. "Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?"

9. "Bi-Curious George"

10. "Pop! Goes The Hamster.... And Other Great Microwave Games"

Robots in Disguise!

Have you seen the new Transformers movie?
It's so freakin' awesome, Michael Bay has really amp'd up the action in this one!
My favourite scene was when the nun fought the shark under water!*











*Most likely not an actual a scene in the new movie...

This is why I love 5 Second Films

The 86 Rules of Drinking

#37. Try one new drink each week.

#8. When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails.

#25. It is only permissible to shout 'woo-hoo!' if you are doing a shot with four or more people.

#32. You can have a shot of their hard liquor only if the cap has been cracked and the bottle goes for less than $25.

#3. Whoever buys the shot gets the first chance to offer a toast.

#53. Never yell out jukebox selections to someone you don't know.

#74. If you hesitate more than three seconds after the bartender looks at you, you do not deserve a drink.

#85. On the intimacy scale, sharing a quiet drink is between a handshake and a kiss.

Be Cool and Glamorous, with CRACK!

Oh wait, if Pee Wee says I shouldn't, then maybe I really shouldn't...


On the other hand...

Hot damn, I'm second from the top!

The 86 Rules of Drinking

#1. If you owe someone money, always pay them back in a bar. Preferably during happy hour.

#56. Screaming, “Someone buy me a drink!” has never worked.

#67. Never ask a bartender “what's good tonight?” They do not fly in the scotch fresh from the coast every morning.

#43. A bar is a college, not a nursery. If you spill a beer, clean it up. If you break a glass, wait for a staff member to clean it up, then blame it on someone else.

#36. If you ever feel depressed, get out a bartender’s guide and browse through all the drinks you’ve never tried.

#33. The only thing that tastes better than free liquor is stolen liquor.

#27. Learn how to make a rose out of a bar napkin. You'll be surprised how well it works.

#81. If you’re going to drink on the job, drink vodka. It’s the no-tell liquor.

There's nothing in the world like ACTION PARK!

Man, I really really wish I could've gone to Action Park when I was a kid. Action Park was a unique water park in New Jersey that was open from 1978 to 1996. This water park really was unlike any other in the world. It was built from scratch with no prototypes to go on, this means that all the rides and water slides were original. This also meant that the rides fun but also insanely dangerous or as one person describes: "THE FUNNEST PLACE TO DIE!!"

The locals (and Doctors at near by hospitals) had several names for Action Park including: Traction Park, Accident Park, Class Action Park, Danger Park, and Death Park!

The Rides were just as inventive, check out a couple of these descriptions from Wikipedia:

Diving Cliffs: There was a pair of diving cliffs — one 23 feet (7 m), the other 18 feet (5.4 m) — above a 16-foot (5 m) deep pool. However, the pool below was not blocked off from those who might be swimming in or away from other attractions, and nothing at water level gave any indication to swimmers below that they could expect people to dive in right next to them - or right on top of them. The sole lifeguard on duty often had his or her hands full dealing with the results of those collisions. Also, nonswimmers would jump off the cliffs, not fully appreciating how deep the water below was, and have to be rescued. Former employee Tom Fergus says the bottom of the pool was eventually painted white to make it easier to spot any bodies on the bottom. The large pool into which people jumped is no longer used for regular swimming, only to deposit used tubes.

The Kayak Experience: After the second visitor death in the park's history in 1982 occurred at this ride, it was closed permanently. It was an imitation whitewater course that used submerged electric fans to agitate the water above. Frequently the kayaks got stuck or tipped over, and people had to get out of them to remedy the situation.

Bumper boats: This ride was reserved for toddlers, supposedly since it was safer, but the engines often leaked gasoline, at least once requiring medical attention for one rider when too much got on his skin.

Alpine slide:Action Park's alpine slide descended the mountain roughly below one of the ski area's chairlifts, resulting in much verbal harassment and sometimes spitting from passengers going up for their turn, who would often be entertained by the accidents they witnessed while at the same time hoping to avoid similar fates.

The tracks themselves were made of concrete and fiberglass, which led to numerous serious abraisions on riders who took even mild spills. The tendency of some to ride in bathing suits so they could go on to Waterworld attractions afterwards made this problem worse.

The sleds themselves were a large factor in the injuries. A stick that was supposed to control speed led, in practice, to just two options on the infrequently maintained vehicles: extremely slow, and a speed described by one former employee as "death awaits."

This slide led to the first fatality at the park, a head injury suffered by an employee (it would later be referred to as the "Death Express"). Hay bales at the curves were meant to cushion the impact of those whose sleds jumped the track (a frequent occurrence), but did not always do so effectively. According to state records, in the years 1984 and 1985 the alpine slide produced 14 fractures and 26 head injuries. While park officials regularly asserted its safety, saying that 90-year-old grandmothers could and did ride it, in the early years of the park the slide was responsible for the bulk of the accidents, injuries, lawsuits and state citations for safety violations.

One person described the ride: "I loved the alpine slide!! It was the ultimate rush, not knowing whether you'd live to go on it again."

During it's time, Action Park had many accidents and injuries, but it was the deaths that made the park infamous. Especially the Wave Pool (aka Death Pool) which was responsible for 3 of the 6 deaths that occured at Action Park.

If you can believe it, Action Park...is still around! Although it operates under a new name (Mountain Creek), the park still has some of the same rides!

Blogger James from jamesbrief.com visited the park and had a sense of nostalgia while there..

Tarzan Swing: Still there, and still has about 20 spectato rs watching (still cheering for 5 things: a great swing, a really awful swing like a loud bellyflop, a really big person making a huge splash, a really young kid who actually does it, and girls whose tops fall off) but yesterday there was only one open (I think all still operate maybe, but just not open yesterday). The *HUGE* difference is that diving and flipping are ABSOLUTELY PROHIBITTED! Flips/dives used to be featured prominantly in the commercial for AP, but they mean it at MC: Uri and I saw 2 people get ejected from the park ye sterday immediately when they flipped. They also ("geniously") have a second rope attached to reel-in the trapeeze when it doesn't come right back. I remember at AP, they used to have hooks attached to ropes and tried to "spear" the trapeeze back (sometimes taking a few minutes!). It was also funny to see little kids fall immediately, older/taller people fall when their feet hit the water (didn't hold up their knees), and a few dumbasses who were too scared (or stupid) to let go at the apex, and swung back to the launch platform, hitting the mat, and bellyflopping into the water, with the spectators laughing and "Ooooooo'ing"!

After all of this, you might think that Action Park couldn't get any worse (or better depending on your view) but...it...does.
I introduce to you, the LOOPING WATER SLIDE!
I'll let you think about that for a minute.
This place had a water slide....that did a loop, like a roller coaster, but it's a freakin' water slide.
This thing is a bit of an urban legend among park enthusiasts but it existed and I have proof:

From what I can gather, the Germans are the only other people to have built a looping water slide. Theirs is fairly new and it isn't a true vertical loop like the one at Action Park. You can check out a video of it:

The only thing scarier than a looping water slide is an old German in a Speedo. *shudder*

Twistori

This concept is really unique. It takes posts from Twitter and organizes them into 6 (currently 7) categories: Love, Hate, Think, Believe, Feel, and Wish (Volunteer is also available, but I think it's only for a limited time.)

These posts are then displayed in an ever changing stream of posts. You spend hours just reading all the posts and peering into people's lives.
Check it out here.

The 86 Rules of Drinking:

#9. Get the bartender's attention with eye contact and a smile.

#23. Girls hang out, apply make-up, and have long talks in the bathroom. Men do not.

#29. If you owe someone twenty dollars or less, you may pay them back in beer.

#10. Do not make eye contact with the bartender if you do not want a drink.

#35. Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it was all good times every jackass would be doing it.

#71. It's acceptable, traditional in fact, to disappear during a night of hard drinking. You will appear mysterious and your friends will understand. If they even notice.

#44. Being drunk is feeling sophisticated without being able to say it.

#21. Our parents were better drinkers than we are.

Monday Movie Review

I'm not a big fan of horror movies, I feel that if I'm paying money to see a film, I'd rather have fun and laugh then be scared sh!tless. I'd say the majority of movies that I watch are comedies. Tonight was different however, tonight I watched Sam Rami's film "Drag Me To Hell."

When I first saw the trailer I thought it was another one of those stupid scary movies that seem to be cranked out every month. Not being a horror fan, I can't really compare this movie to anything, but I have to say I was entertained. I understand that people like to be scared every now and then, just look at theme parks and haunted houses. This movie certainly had it's fill of "jolt you out of your seat" scary moments and I enjoyed every one of them. Unlike the "Saw" movies, "Drag Me To Hell" relies on classic suspense and surprise rather than blood and gore (though it did have a wonderful "nose bleed" scene.)

The movie is over the top and that's what makes it great. You can't go into this film expecting it to be a serious horror flick. I read one review that described it as "the exorcist directed by Bugs Bunny." Maybe I enjoyed this movie because of it's cartoonish scares or maybe because it was also very funny. Raimi's dark sense of humour blended well with the rest of the film and it's stylistic scary scenes.

The suspense in this movie is made even suspensfuller, (yeah I just made it up) by the score. The music builds and builds until you can't take it anymore and you're left waiting for something to happen, then it either does or doesn't, but either way it'll catch you off guard.

The movies stars Justin Long and Allison Lohman, who I think both did an excellent job. I'm especially impressed by Lorna Raver who played Mrs. Sylvia Ganush (aka the creepy gypsy lady). She was able to make a creepy character REALLY creepy, especially at the start of the car scene.

So far the movie has been receiving superb reviews and it definitely deserves them. "Drag Me To Hell" brought a lot more to the table than I was really expecting and I think it's safe to say that the next time a good horror flick comes around you won't have to drag me to it!




"Here kitty kitty kitty..."